it's like falling when you try to fly.
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nineteen
4MINUTE!, BEAST!
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carine
clara
geraldine
gloria
grace
hongxi
huitong
lauren
sherli
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yanyin
yeeling
yinghan
yunteng
clara
geraldine
gloria
grace
hongxi
huitong
lauren
sherli
xueli
yanyin
yeeling
yinghan
yunteng
Wednesday, August 19, 2009, 2:46 PM
:'(
i've been such a crybaby lately. i can't help it but to tear whenever it comes into my mind. i doubt i'll ever be able to explain how i feel inside & cos there's just too much things coming at one go. i apologise for the constant moodswings & if i've offended anyone unknowingly. seriously it's getting on my nerves. to the outsiders, it may seem tht im just throwing tantrums like a princess or whtever. but actually, it just really is tht unbearable. if you were to experience this kind of things, i bet everyone would be the same. hopefully this is the last time i tear over it. i just wana be okay. im cracking under pressure right now. havent been in the right mood to study & studies have remained stagnant for days.took the pink form & went off school with aili today. have not been feeling well these few days. i just can't stand school. im dreading it more & more with so many shits happening everyday. i just wana isolate myself every now & then. alone with nothing to worry & think of but to do wht i have at hand. i thought encouragements were the easiest form of showing concern but no, it had to be a two/three words encouragement which bears no meaning & warmth at all. it sets me wondering if all tht i've done was worth it. & if it was out of genuine concern. i really can't feel tht kind of warmth anymore from you. but yah, people come, people go. it's still the fond memories i had tht kept me going, although one or two incidents of lies & betrayal could just outweigh the so-many fond memories. of course i wont deny tht im prepared to forgive, but forgetting is just way too difficult a task.
im apologetic to people around me. especially tfc, cyl, aili, sak, xh & steadie, although most wouldnt be seeing it. sorry for not being myself these days & creating unnecessary troubles for you all. i'll try to regain my usual self.
fighting!