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it's like falling when you try to fly.
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nineteen 4MINUTE!, BEAST! Tag
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carine
clara geraldine gloria grace hongxi huitong lauren sherli xueli yanyin yeeling yinghan yunteng |
Friday, May 15, 2009, 8:16 PM
breaking's what the heart is for
i've never been able to put myself on a balanced position. it's just difficult to do so. & it's been getting worse since. & im getting way off. i've chosen the path myself & i dont know if im doing the right thing. i know i shouldnt be getting too emotional but sometimes it doesnt work by just asking yourself to chill. the heart sorts of get in the way of the brain & emotions just flow out all of a sudden. i havent been having a good week & i hope this will end. otherwise i'll just be better off dead. my chinese test was crap. & i've never felt this sudden urge to * so much before, but i just had it this week. it's so totally unbearable & i dont wish to speak or even mention about it anymore. im just so dissatisfied with my bloody self. i see lots of catching up to do & homework is shouting straight into my face. i dont even know where to start in the first place. & i'll always be neglecting chemistry, for sure. stupid shit. if im given the chance again, i guess i'll be hesitating on where i should go & what to do next. i wouldnt have been so firm like how i used to be.. i hope to get back all the firm-ness i had. alright, i want it back. st & lt are in taiwan now! how i wished i were with them.. |
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